At what cost do you want to be thin?

SO at what cost do I want to be thin?
If I eat less calories then I am weak and don't' have any energy.
If I don't do Strength training I am weak and don't' have any energy.
If i just starve myself I am weak and don't' have any energy.
If I work out and starve myself I am weak and don't' have any energy.
I have tried all these scenarios and the ONLY thing that makes sense is that my body weight is what God has designed my body to be at.

I personally have lost inches. My body is seeing great changes. However, I have not lost a great deal of weight. My lean body mass has went up and my fat has went down. My fat weight has turned into muscle. I tell you that and yet I want that scale to say I lost weight.
My husband keeps reminding me that it is not the weight that should be my concern but the shape of my body.
I know I am a few pants sizes smaller but I want to WEIGH LESS.
But the question for me is, "Tia do you want to be strong and lean rather than skinny and weak?"

I keep my calorie count around 1300-1500 I am 5'7.5" and weigh in a range of 136-138. YET i want to weigh 125. WHY? Is is society telling me that? NO! It is ME telling me that I should be at the weight I was before my 2nd child.
HOWEVER..I have come to a realization (with the help of my husband after years of telling me) ...I had a baby. My body shouldn't be the same as it was 2 children ago.
He is right! Our bodies are different and we should respect that.
THIS is what I have been practicing lately...
I will stop stressing over the scale
I will look at how physical I am.
I will look at all things I have accomplishment in a day
I will look at all the TV I have not watched
I will look at the positive influences I have in others lives
I will give praise to God!

Get off the scale and think, "At what cost do I want to be thin?"
TIA